I'm On A Blimp
by RosalindHawkins
Summary: Kaiba holds his 21st birthday party on his blimp. Smut ensues. Arrogantshipping (Seto x Mai), Polarshipping (Joey x Mai), Puppyshipping (Joey x Seto), Ettushipping (Seto x Joey x Mai). Contains: language, lemon, alcohol.
1. Not Enough

Seto Kaiba was a man made of ice. Cold and cruel, haughty and cool. Always so controlled, so precise, so proper. It drove Mai mad. For once, she'd like to see some kind of passion in him, something to prove that he was fully human. When she heard about his twenty-first birthday celebration, she thought she'd finally get a chance to see it. After all, drunkenness counted as passion.

It was being held on his blimp, KaibaCraft 3 to be precise, the same location of the Battle City Semi-Finals. It was a wild party, the kind that every billionaire deserved to throw at some point.

Mai and Joey had been dating on and off for the past several months, and since they were currently in the off stage, Mai decided that she would let herself have a bit of fun—and help Seto to have some fun along the way, too. If he wasn't going to indulge a little, then she'd make him. After all, he may be a jerk and a rich snob, but everyone deserved to live it up a little on their twenty-first birthday.

She didn't find him at the bar and she didn't find him in the stratos dueling arena, which were the two likeliest locations for him to be, or so she'd thought. She poked around the rooms of partiers, wandering into emptier areas of the blimp until at last she'd found him heading towards the cockpit. He hadn't drunk anything at all, yet, had he? He looked so put-together, so neat and tidy, she wanted nothing more than to rake her hands through that perfect hair and rip his clothes from his body. Good thing she was smart enough to grab a couple drinks when she was at the bar; thanks to alcohol, she probably had a decent chance of doing that.

"Well, if it isn't the birthday boy, abandoning his own party, no doubt," Mai teased, her own face already flushed from a few drinks. She moved to stand in the center of the hallway as he approached, blocking his path so that he couldn't get around her to the elevator. He frowned as he got closer, and she continued to jeer, "I'll bet you haven't even had one drink yet, have you?"

"What's it to you?" he crossed his arms as he came to a stop in front of her.

"I just want you to have fun, Kaiba." Her eyelids had started to droop a little as her voice took on a more sultry tone. He just rolled his eyes at her.

"You can move aside on your own or I'll move you by force," he said coldly, completely ignoring her words.

"Do you even know _how_ to have fun?" Mai taunted before sipping her drink and holding out the other to him. He stared down at the glass with his icy blue eyes.

"If I drink that, will you let me go by?"

Mai was getting frustrated now. She'd set out on a mission to seduce Seto Kaiba, and by golly, she was going to achieve her mission. "You don't even look like you're twenty-one," she said scornfully before finishing her own drink. "I look at you and all I see is a sexually repressed teenager trying to act like an adult."

Seto's eye twitched once, the only indicator besides his permanent glare that he was displeased. In truth, this wasn't the first time, or even the first time tonight, that someone had accused him of being either sexually repressed or virginal, or both. He snatched the drink from Mai's hand and downed it in one go, startling her for a moment.

"My personal life is no business of yours, and I'd appreciate it if you left me alone," he growled, then attempted to push past her, but she stopped him, stepping over to block his path as he stepped closer. His cheeks tinted red as his attempts at going past her were foiled again, and their bodies were now pressed close, both to stubborn and proud to yield to the other.

"You don't deny it, then?"

"I do deny it. I am not a teenager and I am _not_ sexually repressed."

"Then prove it." She seized his head in her hands and pulled him down into a hard kiss. He made a token effort to resist, but she knew that he'd already lost the fight. Few men could resist her once she made up her mind. She was much better than them at saying no. As if to get back at her for her accusations, Seto kissed her roughly, pushing her back against the wall and pressing her there firmly. She'd underestimated both his strength and his willingness to use that strength against a woman. Suddenly, she saw him in a whole new light. She saw that he was dangerous, and it took her breath away.

Seto knew that he was being played, but at the moment, he didn't really care. He was sick of people thinking that he was incapable of human emotions. He was just as human as anybody else. He HAD a sex life, he was just incredibly discreet about it. For one thing, he didn't need his kid brother reading about him in the tabloids, even if he wasn't a child anymore. For another, he liked to keep his private life private. He couldn't comprehend why those things made people think he was a prude.

The glasses for their drinks had long since fallen to the floor as they shifted and stumbled through the nearest doorway, still liplocked and groping, not even bothering to turn on the lights. Neither seemed willing to relinquish control, but Seto had the clear advantage and Mai had no choice. He effortlessly hooked his foot behind her ankle and tumbled her onto the bed so that she fell onto her back. The look of surprise on her face was priceless. He leaned down over her, planting his hands on either side of her toned thighs.

"Do I look like a sexually repressed teenager to you now?" he asked in a low, seductive voice that rivaled her own in its efficacy.

"No, but looks can be deceiving," she answered cheekily, fluttering her eyelashes at him. "I still think I need you to prove it to me."

Seto grinned. That was exactly what he'd wanted to hear.

"I'll make you eat your words, Mai Valentine, and more than just that."

* * *

As the copilot returned to the cockpit with a fresh mug of coffee, he expected the hallway to be silent and peaceful with just the dull pounding of the club music upstairs pounding through the ceiling as the erotic vocals echoed in his ears:

 _"I want your love and all your love is revenge/ you and me could write a bad romance/ o-o-o-o-oh…"_

Halfway to his destination, he heard noise from one of the private rooms. He didn't pause to listen, but he didn't need to pause to listen, they were being loud enough on their own. A shriek of feminine laughter followed him as he stayed the course. He'd flown the KC3 for Kaiba's blimp parties before, so he was used to this sort of thing happening.

* * *

"Had enough yet?"

Mai giggled as a husky whisper blew across her ear. "I think I need a bit of a break," she admitted breathlessly, and he pulled away, leaving her alone on the bed as he went to collect his carefully folded clothes from the chair where he'd placed them. In a matter of seconds, he looked presentable again, and she was still a mess.

"Going somewhere?"

"Didn't you say that I wasn't drinking enough?" he shot back. "I was going to get us something from the bar."

"Maybe while you're up there, you could grab Joey and bring him back with you—for double the fun." She winked at him as he paused in the process of putting his shirt back on.

"You're kidding, right?"

"Oh, don't tell me you've never wanted to fuck his brains out before," Mai teased. "I think you'll find him on the dancefloor with Duke."

"You two are so dysfunctional." He smoothed his hair back with one hand. "If you want me to abduct him and deposit him here, I will, but I make no guarantees about what happens after that."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"I mean," Seto smirked, "If he wakes up with a sore ass tomorrow, he had it coming to him."

* * *

 **Author Notes:** Oh my, this piece is so sordid and scandalous! I should go wash my hands out with soap. ;) Honestly, though, this was the only way I could see them getting together in a one-shot while remaining relatively in character. Besides, it's a nice change of pace from my usual stuff.

You can blame Mai for turning it into a threesome; Seto wouldn't have suggested that, but he sure would have gone along with it. Speaking of Seto, he's really different in this fic compared to my others; I don't really know how that happened. I think I've turned him into a womanizer here. ^_^' Sorry…

The song featured is "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga, because it seemed very fitting at the moment, since Seto was getting revenge on Mai for saying he was "sexually repressed," but she wanted it. Also, I was watching a "Bad Romance" puppyshipping AMV on YouTube while writing this… that may or may not have influenced the outcome


	2. Too Much

**Author Notes:** Please enjoy this gratuitous dub-con orgy. I can't believe I just wrote that. XP

* * *

Seto found Joey utterly drunk on the dancefloor, just as Mai had predicted. Seto seized a bottle of champagne from the bar, then set about wrangling the loud-mouthed blond. He hooked his arm around Joey's waist as the blond gyrated wildly to the music with Duke Devlin pressed against him. Seto started to drag Joey off the dancefloor, and only after several moments did Joey start to realize what was happening.

"Hey, whaddya think ya doin', Koiba?" Joey slurred as he was dragged out into a quiet, emptier hallway.

"My name is not Koiba," the brunette growled as he dragged Joey at a brisk pace.

"Where are we goin'?"

"To your girlfriend," Seto answered brusquely, still gripping the bottle of champagne by the neck in his left hand.

"Really? Or are you just looking for an excuse to get me alone?" Joey teased, then laughed at himself.

"You wish," Seto scoffed as he rolled his eyes. "I thought I told the bartender _specifically_ not to serve you any drinks because you're underage. How did you get so drunk?"

"I got friends, Koiba, unlike you," Joey retorted as he stumbled along.

"My name is _not_ Koiba," Seto repeated as he tossed Joey a glare, then came to an abrupt stop in front of the correct room. "Get in." He gave Wheeler a shove, letting him stumbled into the dim room before entering behind him and firmly locking the door.

"Wha—?"

"Come here, Joey." That was Mai, beckoning the boyfriend she'd dumped just last week back into bed with her. The blond seemed dazed, like he had no idea what was going on, but he was willing to go along with just about anything, he was so drunk. As he made out with Mai—who was kneeling on the bed—Seto came up behind him and started to stroke him through his pants.

Was Joey really so delirious as to groan in response to his enemy's touches and not realize that it was Seto Kaiba himself who was arousing him? Or was he secretly turned on by Seto all this time?

Mai had finished unbuttoning Joey's shirt and was pushing it off of Joey's shoulders, so Seto finished stripping it off the narrower body and dropped it to the floor. He let his fingers knead into Joey's lower body, eliciting a gratifying groan.

As Joey's spine arched and he grunted, Mai started kissing his neck, nipping and licking his vulnerable skin as she undid his belt and pants. Kaiba pushed the blond's pants down before taking care of his own. Mai lifted her head for a moment to catch the brunette's eye, the both of them smirking with satisfaction.

As things progressed, it became abundantly clear that Joey was aware of his rival's presence behind him, and that he didn't care. He sure did seem to be enjoying himself, after all. Joey mounted Mai and Seto mounted Joey, the two sexual predators making love to their drunken puppy until they'd all exhausted themselves.

* * *

The next morning, Joey woke up with a hangover that made him feel absolutely wretched. He was reluctant to open his eyes, but when he did, it was to quite a surprise: Kaiba and Mai, their faces side by side as they watched him closely.

"What the fuck!?" he exclaimed, confused and shocked. Mai rolled her eyes as Seto smirked and sat up on the bed, looking clean and fresh.

"You owe me twenty bucks, Valentine," Kaiba said smugly as he stood and walked towards the door.

"Like you're not already rich enough," she tossed back cheekily, but she didn't look genuinely angry at him.

"You can pay me next time we meet. I have to get to a meeting." Those were Seto's last words before he left, not even saying goodbye.

"What happened last night?" Joey asked Mai, unable to recall anything after dancing with Duke.

"How about we get cleaned up and I'll tell you when we get home." Mai smiled at Joey sweetly before giving him a peck on the cheek.

"Does this mean we're back together?"

"Yes, Joey, we're back together."


End file.
